Category Archives: Dip

Wholly Salsa

I was really struggling with finding a snack to post about today. You may think that someone who writes a blog called SkinnyOffice has an abundance of low-cal snacks in their kitchen cabinet just waiting to be blogged about. But the truth is (is telling the truth here like a magician giving away the secrets to his tricks?) all we have is a meek and quickly dwindling Google doc, which means that most of the time I’m left to my own devices to unearth some obscure snack to blog about.

I find inspiration in the strangest places– everywhere from the supermarket (ok, finding a snack in the supermarket is not strange at all) to the streets of NYC– but  I discovered today’s snack in the most unlikely way.

It happened on Saturday afternoon, when I was rushing down Broadway to get to Club Monaco before my 3pm manicure appointment. I made to to Club Monaco by 2:30, returned the muumuu-type dress that had been crumpled in a bag in my closet for 2 weeks, and mustered up every ounce of energy I had to sprint back to 8th street before my nail appointment. I was making good time–by 2:45 I was crossing Houston– but then something stopped me in my tracks. It was a man with a cat on his head. He had a dog-carrier type bag with a cat inside and the other (more interesting) cat was on his head, like a very furry top hat. I tried to take his picture without him noticing, but he asked for a dollar when he saw my iPhone pointed towards him. I felt a bit sorry for cat man so I gave him the dollar, but when I started thinking about it I realized that he was probably warmer than I was that day, because having a cat on your head must provide great insulation.

Very warm and health conscious Cat Man

This guy didn’t have snacks squirreled away under the cat or anything cool like that, but he was also carrying a grocery bag and in it I saw Wholly Salsa. I’d never heard of Wholly Salsa, but I was very intrigued about Cat Man’s epicurean tastes so when I arrived home (with freshly painted nails) I googled Wholly Salsa, and then went out and bought some for myself.

I know all salsa is pretty low calories, but Wholly Salsa has only 10 calories in every 2 tablespoons and 0 grams of fat. As an added bonus, it contains 15% of your daily requirement for vitamin C!

Maybe I’ll ask Cat Man to guest blog next week? I hope I didn’t steal his snack idea.






Blue Diamond Wasabi & Soy Sauce Almonds

I keep almost no food in my fridge. I hate to admit it, but I never, ever cook (except for one half-assed attempt to make fish in September), so there’s really no reason for me to have anything other than a few bottles of seltzer (basically the only thing I drink), an old clove of garlic that my mom gave me in hopes that owning garlic might lead me to some culinary epiphany, and a super-size bottle of soy sauce. You might think the soy sauce has no place in an apartment so devoid of things one might put soy sauce on, but the truth is, soy sauce makes literally everything taste better and there’s nothing on earth that I wouldn’t put it on. I love soy sauce so much it actually haunts my dreams.

Once I had this very old cucumber, which I had accidentally left sitting in my kitchen in the bottom of a grocery bag for about 3 days. When I found it, I was about to throw it out and then I had the brilliant idea to douse it in soy sauce. When I tried it I couldn’t even tell that the cucumber had spent the past 3 days rotting on my floor!

Ok, my cucumber wasn't this old. But I bet soy sauce could even help this!

I’d be happy if everything I ever ate for the rest of my life was completely saturated in soy sauce– really, I would. So that’s why I was just ecstatic when I discovered Blue Diamond Wasabi & Soy Sauce Almonds. 

I’m not a huge almond fan– they’re plain and sometimes the brown part gets stuck in my teeth. But cover almonds in a little wasabi and soy sauce and you have a delicious treat! Blue Diamond almonds have just the right about of wasabi. They’re not too hot, but you definitely can taste it. And the soy sauce, oh, I don’t even need to say anything about the soy sauce. SO. GOOD. There are 170 calories in 28 nuts, and I’m not sure of the exact science, but I know that nutritionists always recommend eating them because they keep you full. Or maybe because they have good fats. Or maybe both. Either way, these almonds are so good you won’t even think of looking at the nutrition label.



Bobbi’s Fat-Free Roasted Garlic Hummus

So it’s Sunday of Thanksgiving weekend, and I’m trying to get out of my parents’ house as fast as possible. I stuff my ten unused Thanksgiving outfit options into my suitcase, leave a couple of shopping receipts on my mother’s desk  (“You told me I could put that fur vest on your card! Don’t you remember? Well I NEED it!”), and run downstairs. Well, more like practically fall downstairs with the force of my suitcase behind me. Anyway, as I run out the door my mom hands me a Links of London bag.

The source of my mother's deceptive antics.

“Here, take this,” she insists. I stare at her with an intrigued look on my face. Did she get me that bracelet I wanted? Did Hanukkah come early? I knew I was good during Thanksgiving weekend, but I didn’t know I was THIS good. But what the hell, I’ll take it.

I get home, exhausted from a car ride with my father during which we talked about my future and career and a horrible concept called “self-sufficiency,”  and finally look in my bag to retrieve my present. Is it a new watch? No. Is it that bracelet I’ve had my eye on? No. Is it even jewelry or even from Links of London? No and no. It’s cracked pepper turkey.

The only thing more depressing than finding cracked pepper turkey when you were expecting a gold necklace is the thought of calling your mom to say, “Thanks for the cracked pepper turkey, Mom.” And who even wants to eat turkey after Thanksgiving weekend?? Well okay, I do, but she doesn’t know that.

I get into the office today, clutching my turkey in my Links of London bag, hoping that it makes me look like I casually stop by the store on weekday mornings to pick up some new jewelry all the time, and realize that I can’t eat this turkey plain, as delicious as it is. And since Georgia and I have decided to cut carbs due to the unspeakable amount of food we ate during Thanksgiving, I don’t want bread with it–I just want a condiment. And I know just the one.

I run to our SkinnyFridge and pull out Bobbi’s Fat-Free Roasted Garlic Hummus. Now, I have something to say about hummus: it is tricky. First of all, it can’t decide whether to be a dip or a condiment. It’s like, just decide, hummus! Second of all, everyone thinks it is soooo healthy just because it’s made of chickpeas, and people just looove to slather it all over their falafel and act like they are so healthy and hipster as they talk about PETA and gender bias and the problem of bourgeois hegemony–okay, so I went to Brown–but everyone is wrong, my SkinnyFriend. Most of the time, hummus is fattening and caloric and is very dangerous in uncontrolled portions. So unhealthy and SO unhipster.

It's no Links of London either, but it's very good!

But Bobbi’s hummus is fantastic-tasting and is not dangerous at all! It’s creamy and garlicky (don’t eat it before a date) and is everything one could want in hummus. It is fat-free and has only 20 calories per two teaspoons, which is AMAZING for hummus and by my calculations means there are only 240 calories in the whole container. So if you end up accidentally eating half the container when you anxiety-eat your baby carrots at 10:30 pm, no need to feel suicidal!

My rolled-up-turkey-slices dipped in Bobbi’s hummus ended up being a great carb-free SkinnySnack. PLEASE go out and try this hummus, because not only will you like it but you will also be supporting Bobbi, the mysterious mastermind behind this hummus, so that maybe she can come out with more delicious products. Thanks, Bobbi! (And okay, okay…thanks for the cracked pepper turkey, Mom.)