‘Twas 8 am Sunday morning, when all through my boyfriend’s apartment, not a roommate was stirring, not even the unidentifiable guy sleeping on the couch. Their big “Christmukkah” party had been the night before, and after a night of eating, drinking, dancing, crying a little, and then dancing more, I woke up needing a glass of water almost as much as I need this snood (hint hint, Mom…oh who am I kidding, she’s not reading).
As I tiptoed into the living room, I surveyed the wreckage. Lots of empty beer cans, half-eaten cookies, a small pile of nuts on the floor…not too bad, I thought, as I cautiously made my way to the sink. My own room has looked worse, often after a trying-on-everything-I-own-while-wailing-that-I-hate-it-all rampage.
It seems that I wasn’t quite cautious enough, because all of a sudden I felt some sort of sticky rod-shaped object beneath my (previously) clean, festively-red-toenailed foot. I gingerly lifted up my foot to see what it was: a lone, half-crushed mini candy cane–the poor little guy! Must’ve been in the wrong place in the wrong time. Welcome to my life, I wanted to tell it.
I managed to clean off my foot, obtain my water (Mother Nature’s SkinnyDrink), and sneak back into bed without being completely traumatized. The whole incident, while unfortunate, ended up serving a very useful purpose in reminding me 1) always to wear socks in my boyfriend’s apartment, and 2) about one of the season’s best SkinnySnacks–mini candy canes.
There is literally NO downside to mini candy canes, they are like manna from Santa. THREE of them are about 40-50 calories. They are festive, minty sweet, and take a long time to eat. You can even lick one until the end gets all pointy and then use it to threaten an irritating coworker. Holding one will add a charming sense of holiday spirit to your appearance, so you can flaunt one in front of that cute new guy. They are cute and striped and will make your breath smell better after all that garlic hummus. And if none of those reasons are enough, even my homie Snoop likes them. Enough said.
Epilogue: Later, I went into the kitchen and scanned the room for other, whole, wrapped mini candy canes that I was maybe or maybe not planning on stealing for the office. Alas, none were to be found. What else could I do but take an unopened bottle of wine instead?